How would you describe your Dominant style (e.g., strict, nurturing, sadistic)?
Playfully sadistic, secretly caring
What’s your favourite aspect of being a Dom?
Free rein to keep to make my sub much more horny, much more often than I’d be able to in a vanilla relationship. This isn’t necessarily the same with every sub though, if I really like someone and they like things more then that would soon become my favourite in that relationship.
How did you discover your Dominant side?
I originally used to RP online, after a while realised whatever roles we were playing I always soon turned it into myself dominating the girl anyway, then when I stumbled across the old site there was no stopping me lol.
How long have you been in the lifestyle?
About 10-11 years.
What do you value most in a D/s dynamic?
Honesty and trust
What do you think makes a power exchange healthy and sustainable?
Again, honesty, trust, using likes/dislikes/limits in the way the sub regards them, a genuine connection
How do you approach negotiation and establishing limits?
I don’t really try to change anyone’s mind about limits, if there’s something really quite tame in there I’ll just ask them about why it’s a limit as we’re getting to know each other.
How do you handle aftercare, both giving and receiving?
I try to stay around talking with my sub as long as she wants me to after play, make sure she’s very aware how well she did and how happy she’s made me and find out exactly how she’s feeling, if anything was too much or unenjoyable, check if she’s still suffering in anyway and generally give cuddles as well as you can online.
What qualities do you look for in a submissive?
Playful, honest, a connection and attraction of some kind, just that 6th sense that makes them stand out to you even if all you can see is what they’ve typed.
How do you build trust with a new partner?
I’m 100% open with subs and don’t expect the same in return, I stay focussed on their likes until we’ve played and talked enough to understand their dislikes and maybes and generally reassure them that while I’m in charge, they still get to decide what I’m in charge of.
What red flags would make you walk away from a dynamic?
Reporting or responses that just don’t add up, growing suspicion that they may not be who they say they are, I guess dishonesty in general. Maybe finding out something they’ve done irl or a secret kink that I just can’t accept as okay though that’s not happened yet that I can remember.
Do you believe being a Dom is something you are, or something you do?
Being dominant is something you are, being a dominant is something you do, you need both.
What’s something you wish more people understood about Dominance?
Can’t really think of much, maybe to vanilla people that it’s just a natural style and not something weird or scary
If you could create your ideal scene, what would it look like?
Probably nothing unusual, my own bedroom with a bondage bed, several other pieces of bondage furniture around, St Andrews cross, Symbian, stocks, wooden pony, maybe 1 or 2 others, a few variations of each toy and if we’re in dreamland, I guess 2 pretty subs to play with at night.
