In kink we have a lot of terms that describe the relationship between a top and bottom. Some tops are doms, sirs, Daddy's to name a few but to me a very specific term is Master. To me a Master is much more than a Dom. I have had a lot of doms/sirs/Daddy's but only one Master.. Only one man I can truly say I gave everything to. It didn't matter what he asked of me because I knew it was for the better of my self and our relationship. I often describe the Dom/sub relation to something like dating and the Master/Slave relationship to a marriage. But that doesn't truly describe it. When your married you wear a ring to signify your partnership. When I was owned I didn't wear a ring that could be so easily removed or hidden. I wore a collar one that was small and steel that was welded on by my Master. We had a ceremony much like one would at a wedding. He cared for me. He pushed me out of my comfort zone in many ways not just in kink but he truly made me better. He gave me any sense of self worth and confidence I have to this day. When I met him I was a shell of the person I am now. seeking Dom's and tops to help me feel something and looking for the moment of peace that came with it. But when I met him it all changed for me. I slept better. I ate better. I took care of my self. I started to actually care about my future because for the first time in my life I saw a future worth having. I often wonder if one day I will ever feel the same for another man. Will another Dom ever earn my trust and make me feel so safe that I would be willing to let them collar me. I hope so but I do have my doubts. My Master made the decision to end the relationship. I will not get into details but he was going down a path he could not escape and did not want me to follow. He cut off my collar and gave me the little bit of money he had and sent me away to stay with some people he knew that helped me continue to build my future. I often wonder what I did to make him choose me all those years ago. That dark room in the back of the party surrounded by some of the most gorgeous girls I have seen and he picked me I will never understand why but I am greatful. The day he removed my collar, that medal hitting the ground. I'll never forget that sound. The look in his eyes he even cried a little and I never saw that from him. I truly hope he's ok but that was the last day I saw him. The last time we talked. Before he removed my collar he gave me my final 3 tasks.
1. To not seek contact with him.
2. To continue to love those around me.
3. To not give up on life.
I find some days these are harder to follow than others.
A lot of people tend to ask things about my kink vs vanilla life but with out kink I would have no life there is no speration between kink and "vanilla" for me.
1. To not seek contact with him.
2. To continue to love those around me.
3. To not give up on life.
I find some days these are harder to follow than others.
A lot of people tend to ask things about my kink vs vanilla life but with out kink I would have no life there is no speration between kink and "vanilla" for me.
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