TW: self harm

[Anonymous (1d38)]

I have used self harm as a coping mechanism. It had been a few years since my last slip. I constantly feel the urge.

Is it ok to use pain in kink to help satiate my need? Or does that count as self harm? Where is the line?

 

[Anonymous (45e1)]

The majority of my kink is to help calm my mind and keep me from self harm. It's why I'm into more intense impact play and knife and blood play. My therapist has told me that it is a more healthy option.

 

[The Brat Princess]

I am neither a therapist or a professional, so this is purely my opinion. My opinion on this is simple yet complex. The simple... it depends but can be OK.

Now the more complex. Self harm is a very difficult topic and can be from some dark places and carry the charge of those emotions with it. Bringing emotions like that into kink can indeed be cathartic and last commenter is right, can be less harmful. However it can also go bad... there have been times I have had to avoid kink for that very reason as I knew I would potentially go to far. It very much depends on the emotions that are brought in. I would say that if it is a scene with another person I would say it is vitally important they know that it is part of it as they can then account for any emotions it could bring up, they also deserve the right to say they are not comfortable using kink that way. However if solo not an issue. Either way I would advise some aftercare routines be considered for after, even if you don't need it it is better to have it ready incase you do. Also be mindful of the emotions you are feeling and the effect they are having.

All that considered yes it can be cathartic and less harmful but as with everything it should be in moderation not a replacement. Therapy (if you are able to get it) is still the best option and one i have used myself. Whatever you decide, please try to be safe in all you do

 

[Masterfulsensation]

Yes it’s okay for you to explore pain in BDSM, I’d say the line is at the point where what you’re doing isn’t guaranteed to be safe anymore. If you’re exploring on your own, do some research into the punishments you’re going to try and stay within sensible safety limits, I self harmed as a teenager so have a little understanding of the distraction pain can be.

 

[Butterfly]

I feel like putting your trust into somebody else makes this safer. That person needs to be aware of your heightened emotions, and your need for "release". You might be less likely to safeword at a time like this, so they need to be aware of your usual limits and err on the side of caution. But I think this could be a much safer way to cope than using self harm.