In the past, @Jaro had a rule that every Sunday he would need to write a blog and post it. Typically this blog was supposed to be an update on how our dynamic is progressing, how his rules are going, what new tasks he done, and he would get to publically share all the horrors that I put him through for your enjoyment. Jaro also would write private reports to a few times a week, so none of the information that he provided in his blogs was very shocking to me. But I like that he had to share some of the details with everybody.
During this time, Jaro became ill. Because of that, I had suspended a lot of his rules. I also stopped giving him new tasks, and adjusted the deadlines on some of his pending tasks. His health comes first and I wanted to make sure that he was taking extra time to rest and get better. However, when Jaro asked if he could skip his blog report that week, I said no.
Jaro didn't feel as though he had anything to share. He had been sick and spending most of his time laying in bed, sleeping or in the bath. So what was the point of writing about that? Well, I think there IS a point.
As much as I would like to deny it, I know that I have been a fairly well known member on getDare. People look to me for advice, or they just follow my blogs, etc. The fact is, people are watching me. And the same goes for Jaro too! People follow our dynamic and they watch what we do. Because of this, I think we have a responsibility to our readers.
A lot of the time, people post about the glamorous, fun, flashy, things. You can especially see that trend on social media. People will post pictures of their clean kitchen, or the pretty outfit they just put on their baby, or the flowers that their boyfriend bought them. But you don't get to see that the rest of the house is a disaster, the baby poured chocolate milk over their head seconds after the photo was taken, and their boyfriend brought home flowers because he cheated on her ...
I think it is so important to talk about the boring things, the mundane things, the messes and accidents and things not going according to a plan. Because, some of you may be looking at us as though we are extremely lucky and perfect and everything just goes so smoothly for us, but let me tell you IT DOES NOT!!!! And we need to talk about those things!
For example, one time Mr. Devious and I tried an anal funnel. The idea was super hot! We bought the funnel because we eventually wanted to be able to pour pee into Mr. Devious' ass. It would really be our first step into pee play. So we bought the funnel (which turned out to be smaller than we thought) and we put it inside him and then I started to slowly pour water in. However, Mr. Devious laughed for some reason ... I don't even remember what made him laugh, but to my horror, the water that was slowly draining into his ass, started to come very quickly back up the tube and filling up the funnel. I was mortified! I did NOT want his butt juice on me! And the more I reacted, the more he laughed, and the more the water started to come back at me. It was absolutely hilarious! But probably not something that most people would share.
I think I do a pretty good job of reporting things as they actually happen. So if I was writing a report or blog about our adventures, I would 100% add that little story to it. But I find that some people like to skip over the mishaps, the unglamorous, or the downright messy and dirty things. And I am guilty of that sometimes too ...
For example, when I wrote my report about being spanked at a play party, one thing that I deliberately glossed over was that because of the position I was standing in, and because of the size of my booty (I am well endowed), and the fact that I was not yet turned on enough to make things slippery, he was not able to slide the vibe into the right position himself. Instead, I stood up, took the vibe from him, tucked into the exact right position and then he put the wire between my legs so that it would be convenient for him to push the buttons.
These things happen!
I think a lot of us read reports on forums, or erotic stories, or watch porn and we see everything look so easy.
When porn stars do anal scenes, there is never ANY mess!! But real life is messy! Shit happens, literally. It may be embarrassing at times, but sometimes, no matter how well you clean, there is going to be a piece of poop that comes out with your plug or dildo. There is going to be some brown lube that leaks out of your bum while being fucked. And sometimes, you put a plug in, or start to do an enema and you have to stop because your tummy decides it is time to go to the bathroom instead.
My point is: nobody is perfect. no dynamic is perfect. no play scene is perfect.
And we shouldn't be ashamed to show it.
So yes, I made Jaro write his blog (although I did give him a one day extension). It may not have been super exciting, or have any new information in it, but it shows that he is a real person; He gets sick sometimes. And it shows that I can be a kind and caring (rather than just being twisted and sadistic and mean) Domme who will make allowances when needed.
I feel like I kind of rambled on a bit in this blog, but what I am trying to say is to not be so hard on yourself. Nobody can live up to standards that we see in porn. Read stories and reports with the knowledge that there was probably at least one bump along the road, not everything goes perfectly every time. We are all human. Messes happen. Mistakes happen. Make allowances for real life (being sick or sad, getting your period, or unexpected visitors popping by). Take time to laugh and not take things so seriously. And PLEASE!!! if you are writing a report, be brave and share the things that didn't go quiet right, and also the things that went horribly wrong!
Kink is hot, but not always so glamorous!
During this time, Jaro became ill. Because of that, I had suspended a lot of his rules. I also stopped giving him new tasks, and adjusted the deadlines on some of his pending tasks. His health comes first and I wanted to make sure that he was taking extra time to rest and get better. However, when Jaro asked if he could skip his blog report that week, I said no.
Jaro didn't feel as though he had anything to share. He had been sick and spending most of his time laying in bed, sleeping or in the bath. So what was the point of writing about that? Well, I think there IS a point.
As much as I would like to deny it, I know that I have been a fairly well known member on getDare. People look to me for advice, or they just follow my blogs, etc. The fact is, people are watching me. And the same goes for Jaro too! People follow our dynamic and they watch what we do. Because of this, I think we have a responsibility to our readers.
A lot of the time, people post about the glamorous, fun, flashy, things. You can especially see that trend on social media. People will post pictures of their clean kitchen, or the pretty outfit they just put on their baby, or the flowers that their boyfriend bought them. But you don't get to see that the rest of the house is a disaster, the baby poured chocolate milk over their head seconds after the photo was taken, and their boyfriend brought home flowers because he cheated on her ...
I think it is so important to talk about the boring things, the mundane things, the messes and accidents and things not going according to a plan. Because, some of you may be looking at us as though we are extremely lucky and perfect and everything just goes so smoothly for us, but let me tell you IT DOES NOT!!!! And we need to talk about those things!
For example, one time Mr. Devious and I tried an anal funnel. The idea was super hot! We bought the funnel because we eventually wanted to be able to pour pee into Mr. Devious' ass. It would really be our first step into pee play. So we bought the funnel (which turned out to be smaller than we thought) and we put it inside him and then I started to slowly pour water in. However, Mr. Devious laughed for some reason ... I don't even remember what made him laugh, but to my horror, the water that was slowly draining into his ass, started to come very quickly back up the tube and filling up the funnel. I was mortified! I did NOT want his butt juice on me! And the more I reacted, the more he laughed, and the more the water started to come back at me. It was absolutely hilarious! But probably not something that most people would share.
I think I do a pretty good job of reporting things as they actually happen. So if I was writing a report or blog about our adventures, I would 100% add that little story to it. But I find that some people like to skip over the mishaps, the unglamorous, or the downright messy and dirty things. And I am guilty of that sometimes too ...
For example, when I wrote my report about being spanked at a play party, one thing that I deliberately glossed over was that because of the position I was standing in, and because of the size of my booty (I am well endowed), and the fact that I was not yet turned on enough to make things slippery, he was not able to slide the vibe into the right position himself. Instead, I stood up, took the vibe from him, tucked into the exact right position and then he put the wire between my legs so that it would be convenient for him to push the buttons.
These things happen!
I think a lot of us read reports on forums, or erotic stories, or watch porn and we see everything look so easy.
When porn stars do anal scenes, there is never ANY mess!! But real life is messy! Shit happens, literally. It may be embarrassing at times, but sometimes, no matter how well you clean, there is going to be a piece of poop that comes out with your plug or dildo. There is going to be some brown lube that leaks out of your bum while being fucked. And sometimes, you put a plug in, or start to do an enema and you have to stop because your tummy decides it is time to go to the bathroom instead.
My point is: nobody is perfect. no dynamic is perfect. no play scene is perfect.
And we shouldn't be ashamed to show it.
So yes, I made Jaro write his blog (although I did give him a one day extension). It may not have been super exciting, or have any new information in it, but it shows that he is a real person; He gets sick sometimes. And it shows that I can be a kind and caring (rather than just being twisted and sadistic and mean) Domme who will make allowances when needed.
I feel like I kind of rambled on a bit in this blog, but what I am trying to say is to not be so hard on yourself. Nobody can live up to standards that we see in porn. Read stories and reports with the knowledge that there was probably at least one bump along the road, not everything goes perfectly every time. We are all human. Messes happen. Mistakes happen. Make allowances for real life (being sick or sad, getting your period, or unexpected visitors popping by). Take time to laugh and not take things so seriously. And PLEASE!!! if you are writing a report, be brave and share the things that didn't go quiet right, and also the things that went horribly wrong!
Kink is hot, but not always so glamorous!