I’m a brat … but wait, it’s not what you think!

Hello, my name is Butterfly and I am a brat.

*gasp*

Now, before you get your torches and pitchforks, let’s take a minute to let me explain what being a brat means to me.

I have come to realize that brats get a bad reputation. I am not saying that there aren’t those brats out there that live to cause absolute chaos and misery, but I am not one of them. I think a lot of brats are understood.

I guess now is a good time to preface this writing by saying that what I am about to describe is MY views on being a brat. They may not be true for any other brat on this planet, but if nothing else, maybe it will lead you to think twice about having a sour opinion of all brats, as we aren’t all the same.

What makes me a brat?

I will frequently call my D type names: butt nugget, jerk face, Mister rainbow glitter sparkles … the sillier the better. I like to find loopholes in instructions and exploit them. I like to stomp my foot and say “no”. Push buttons, tease, make smart ass comments, leave a trail of glitter in my wake … harmless deeds really.

Why I brat?

I have heard from a lot of people that brats act out because they want attention. I guess this can be true. I don’t brat so that I can I be ignored, that’s for sure, but I also don’t brat to get negative attention. I don’t ever want my Dom to punish me. Sure, being offered a spanking or receiving a consequence for pushing too far can be fun, as long as it is “funishment”.

I like to be silly. I like to make my Dom laugh. I like being a challenge. I like to know that I am worth the effort. I never want to cross the line into being truly disrespectful or overly annoying. I brat to have fun. Life is too serious. I want to laugh and nothing gives me pleasure like hearing my Dom laugh and roll his eyes at me.

Bratting: a defence mechanism

Another reason that I find myself bratting is to protect myself. When I am actively bratty, it is harder for me to sink into a submissive state. For example: I am laying on the bed and my Dom is using a flogger on me. I am bantering back and forth, chatting, telling him he is rude, laughing … he starts to hit harder and I quiet down as he gets into a rhythm. I am focusing on the feeling, the sound, and I feel myself slipping into subspace. If this is a new partner, somebody I am not ready to go there with, the banter starts back up. I squirm, I kick my legs. I protect myself from being vulnerable.

This doesn’t just happen in play, but can happen when we are talking about a subject that makes me uncomfortable. It is my way to deflect and protect.

How to control my brat

My brat is not out of control, at least not most of the time. It can be controlled. For the right person, this can happen instantly, with just one warning using a specific word. For somebody who hasn’t got to that point yet, having a discussion, making me feel safe and comfortable, can up the chances of being able to control my brattyness.

As I said, the goal is never to hurt feelings, upset somebody or push them past their limits. This is supposed to be FUN! So being honest about how my bratting is making you feel is a good way for me to reign it back in, especially if you are somebody who I respect.

However, I do need to warn you. If you are hating on my bratty side, or you are rude to me, or you try to demand that I stop bratting for no other reason than you think you can control me … well I might turn into one of those brats who give us a bad name afterall.

Brat does not equal disobedient

I guess the whole point of this writing is to say that not all brats are equal. We don’t all have the same motives. We don’t all want or need the brat “beaten out of” us. I’d personally rather just ask for a spanking. Having the label of brat doesn’t have to be a badge of shame, I actually am pretty proud of being a brat.

It is most important to note that I can be both a brat AND obedient.

 

[MessyAshy]

And some Doms enjoy that dynamic just as much. They don't want a meek obedient plaything, they want to wrestle for control. It's a game, a little challenge to keep them on their toes. Not a blank canvas they can shape as they will, but a finished art piece that doesn't just receive, but gives back just as much.

 

[The Brat Princess]

I can safely say that reading that vibes with both my bratty sub side and my Dom side.

As a Dom I love to have a fun loving bratty sub who will throw glitter as they stomp their feet saying no lol.... The more I need to fight the urge to fall into a uncontrolled fit of laughter at the silly behaviour the better. (Though it douse make controlling the situation a challenge... Hounestly as long as it remains fun it is controlled ) I don't want it to reach disrespectful and would hope that whoever I am playing with feels the same. But brats can bring a lot of fun in that way and I love it.

As a sub I feel much the same. It's not the disobedience that makes, it's the being silly and getting a giggle when you know they are trying so hard to be serious to keep control. There are very few times I would do something more major looking for an actual punishment but even then I want to know the lines that are acceptable to cross that won't cause actual upset, but will result in a punishment I won't like.... Just for when I need it. (And even then I prefer something that can be telegraphed openly before it's done so that whomever the /D is has plenty of time to say no I am not in the head space today and then I wouldn't.)

I agree not all brats are bad like any other area of kink there is good and bad. But it is always worth seeing the good, especially with brats because there can be some truly enjoyable silly fun

 

[Butterfly]

And some Doms enjoy that dynamic just as much. They don't want a meek obedient plaything, they want to wrestle for control. It's a game, a little challenge to keep them on their toes. Not a blank canvas they can shape as they will, but a finished art piece that doesn't just receive, but gives back just as much.

Yes for sure! For me as a Domme, I like playful but not outright bratty in a disobedient way. I like being able to easily put my sub back in their place. But if they didn't push a little, it would just be boring.

 

[Butterfly]

I can safely say that reading that vibes with both my bratty sub side and my Dom side.

As a Dom I love to have a fun loving bratty sub who will throw glitter as they stomp their feet saying no lol.... The more I need to fight the urge to fall into a uncontrolled fit of laughter at the silly behaviour the better. (Though it douse make controlling the situation a challenge... Hounestly as long as it remains fun it is controlled ) I don't want it to reach disrespectful and would hope that whoever I am playing with feels the same. But brats can bring a lot of fun in that way and I love it.

Haha, I always tell my subs that if they can make me laugh, they are doing a good job and probably won't get in as much trouble

 

[The Brat Princess]

Haha, I always tell my subs that if they can make me laugh, they are doing a good job and probably won't get in as much trouble

Got to say I find the same. I am much more inclined to come up with a creatively fun funishment if I have had a good giggle from something silly.... Which in turn promotes more of that behaviour and creates the perfect cycle