It's a topic I feel is not too often addressed - but it's quite a relevant aspect, especially if you're trying to find something more consistent - but struggle 'getting there'.
If you see someone, based for example on earlier posts, or brief chats, and you see some mutual interest - how do you take this forward, and try and work out whether this is something that can grow? And when do you start something, what do you ask, how do you start play?
The first connect
My experience in this is that I do quite well in the first connect, so whenever it's without expectations - just sharing some experience, what you're looking for and some basic likes and background can be a very fun and good conversation started. For more extrovert people this is even easier I guess.
>> My tip for this is to keep it kind of light, I like also talking about broader personal things (although you obviously don't immediately want to give away your identity) - but it helps give some context. And also from the start give a good description of what you are looking for helps.
Dynamics after this first conversation
But then, my personal experience leads to a bit of a more complicated phase, how do you then initiate something? As a Dom - that has quite some experience - I feel I can quite easily anticipate on different kinks, but still you do want to take the right approach!
I know I've in the past also sometimes been too blunt or pushy, but have also had experiences where it was too slow. So what is the right pace?
And an added factor is that especially in a Dom/Sub-type conversation, it may mean the sub won't easily speak up.
>> It's quite important to set up a safe environment - and even if either side is really keen to play, it's still often a better choice to align properly first.
There's other blogs about safewords etc,- so won't repeat that - but make sure communication is done well!
Agreeing & growing
Obviously we then hope things work out - its very important to track the progress well, I've at least experienced that a dynamic quite often further matures - but also changes! Things you thought you liked together may be different, or new opportunities arise!
>> So keep up the clear communication, try and keep an open mind on changes!
If you see someone, based for example on earlier posts, or brief chats, and you see some mutual interest - how do you take this forward, and try and work out whether this is something that can grow? And when do you start something, what do you ask, how do you start play?
The first connect
My experience in this is that I do quite well in the first connect, so whenever it's without expectations - just sharing some experience, what you're looking for and some basic likes and background can be a very fun and good conversation started. For more extrovert people this is even easier I guess.
>> My tip for this is to keep it kind of light, I like also talking about broader personal things (although you obviously don't immediately want to give away your identity) - but it helps give some context. And also from the start give a good description of what you are looking for helps.
Dynamics after this first conversation
But then, my personal experience leads to a bit of a more complicated phase, how do you then initiate something? As a Dom - that has quite some experience - I feel I can quite easily anticipate on different kinks, but still you do want to take the right approach!
I know I've in the past also sometimes been too blunt or pushy, but have also had experiences where it was too slow. So what is the right pace?
And an added factor is that especially in a Dom/Sub-type conversation, it may mean the sub won't easily speak up.
>> It's quite important to set up a safe environment - and even if either side is really keen to play, it's still often a better choice to align properly first.
There's other blogs about safewords etc,- so won't repeat that - but make sure communication is done well!
Agreeing & growing
Obviously we then hope things work out - its very important to track the progress well, I've at least experienced that a dynamic quite often further matures - but also changes! Things you thought you liked together may be different, or new opportunities arise!
>> So keep up the clear communication, try and keep an open mind on changes!