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Connect in another language

Timoteo

Member
Joined
May 11, 2025
This is a question for people whose second language is English. Has it ever occurred to you that even though you understand English perfectly, it's easier to connect with someone when you speak in your own language than when you speak in other languages?

It's strange because it's happened to me that I’m not very interested in the conversation with someone, but since it’s in Spanish, it makes me feel more at ease. In other cases, a conversation in English feels less comfortable, and I have less confidence.

Things you think about in the early morning
 
Native language generally does make a difference. Its just easier to express yourself if your vocabulary is sufficiently rich and dont have to search for works.

Ive spoken, interacted and read so much in English, my brain 'thinks' in English mostly by now. For work I struggle finding the Dutch words these days haha.

But while for example my German is fairly good, talking about emotions and expressing myself would be very complicated.

So totally get it!
 
Deep mastery of a language does make a difference. I do prefer English for kink and sex talk, though. I just don't find dutch a very sexy language at all. To me it makes everything sound vulgar. Also, since I've pretty much done most of my kinky stuff online in English from the very start, it has become my native language for kink and sex terminology.

I also just live bilingual. In the outside world I speak dutch, but online I speak English, my phone is set to English, my pc is set to English, I'll even read the English instructions on a pot noodle. I consider my English poems to be on par with my dutch ones! So I'm not limited by English.
 
This is a question for people whose second language is English. Has it ever occurred to you that even though you understand English perfectly, it's easier to connect with someone when you speak in your own language than when you speak in other languages?

It's strange because it's happened to me that I’m not very interested in the conversation with someone, but since it’s in Spanish, it makes me feel more at ease. In other cases, a conversation in English feels less comfortable, and I have less confidence.

Things you think about in the early morning
For me it really depends on what the topic is. I'm just like messyashy and don't love Dutch dirty talk (In General, it has been done a few times I'm a successful manner :P)

I've also had problems with expressing myself in english. Not so much with typing, as I can think everything I say trough, but when talking in Dutch I have a strong and personal way of talking. I have really struggled with getting that trough when talking english. Tho I am almost 24/7 in voice chat talking in english now, so I am definitely starting to develop my own way of talking in english more and more.

For me it helps that almost everything I like is more and more english, and I have never really done much kink in dutch. As everything online is in English anyway it feels wrong to use Dutch words for it. Even with crochet I much prefer the English terminology and really struggle with the Dutch one.

But to answer the question if it is easier to connect with people in Dutch, in person I'm sure it is. As then I'd get nervous to say something wrong. But online I really wouldn't mind as I've been doing almost only english chatting. If I'd have to go in Dutch it would probably half sound as of I'm writing a serious email or something :p
 
Deep mastery of a language does make a difference. I do prefer English for kink and sex talk, though. I just don't find dutch a very sexy language at all. To me it makes everything sound vulgar. Also, since I've pretty much done most of my kinky stuff online in English from the very start, it has become my native language for kink and sex terminology.

I also just live bilingual. In the outside world I speak dutch, but online I speak English, my phone is set to English, my pc is set to English, I'll even read the English instructions on a pot noodle. I consider my English poems to be on par with my dutch ones! So I'm not limited by English
The same thing happens to me, but with my language, when they speak to me in Spanish it excites me and I like it more than when it is in English. I have always thought that it is due to subconscious issues. My language attributes it to something. further
 
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